wearing your love around my neck made my skin turn green

there's a ton on my mind lately, even issues that i don't acknowledge as
actual significance. over the past year, or few months, i've altered
certain ways of how i go about things i do and say. all the same
feelings are there, i've just allowed myself to broaden the options on
how to deal with all the emotions and thoughts and blahblahblahblah. i
am sometimes weak minded, giving into this strange push and pull i have
with my heart and with my head. its a battle that feels conquered one
day but given a little time, it starts all over again. i'm still
discovering and trying to understand what route suits me best..do i
accept my feelings and play them out without denial or completely bury
them, avoid them and deliberately lie at all costs, to all inquiries.
dabbling with a little of both has only mind fucked me as of recently.
back and forth back and forth.

then i remember that things change. some things don't stay forever, even
if in that moment you are so certain that this one thing will stick,
that when all else fails, its untouchable. consistency changes form and
all of your certainties play tricks on you, almost always. because of
this, those very few things that do stay golden over time, through
scrapes and wounds, should be kept close to your heart. remember that
you are lucky enough to have found forever in something, or someone.

but as hard as you have your heart and mind set on something..it
sometimes isn't enough. pick yourself back up and keep going. my
memories weight heavy on me but i'm only a victim if i allow myself to
be and i could feel sympathy for those who victimize themselves, but i
only pity them because until they're responsible enough to accept their
own flaws and correct them, they will never live. what a waste.

they say home is where the heart is
sleepless on lonely streets
wrote an address across your chest
and told you "your heart is home to me"