it takes hold of me.

i dont know what these nightmares mean. i dont know how to cope with the
paranoia that follows after i wake again. i feel like im zoning out
now.. i feel there is failure ahead of me. enough to make me crash,even
burn and it frightens me. im not ready for the real world i can't even
handle my own insanity, im not equipped to handle anyone else's. i want
to write, let me live.
-- elle